As Unbridled as a Heavenly Steed
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To Try A Horse By Ride 1
1498! 1499!
— 1500!
3000 strikes in the morning, 7000 strikes in the evening— that is the Jigen-ryu style1, which renders a second blow entirely meaningless. With this, that’s half of my morning strikes.
(... It is already quite bright out. The dawn comes quickly when summertime arrives.)
(It helps that it is bright out. Unfortunately, I would look quite suspicious if I were to work on practice-swings in the dark.)
(While I was in school, I could use my family’s dojo or the martial arts room, but I do not have access to either of those here.)
(I have been permitted to do my practice-swings here in the courtyard via written permission from Hasumi-dono, the dorm administrator. Still–)
(Something troublesome happened around April. Since this is a private activity of mine, it is only natural that it did not become very widely known…)
(Someone who wasn't aware of the context saw me practicing my swings in the dark, and took me for some kind of ghost of a “fallen warrior of the dawn” or some such...2)
(But, well, the matter came to a close. Now I can work on my practice swings like this without feeling like I will worry anyone.)
(While there is something that steels your spirit when you wear a proper dojo uniform in a dojo… I suppose silently swinging my blade in a quiet garden like this isn’t so bad.)
(After all, just about everyone is still asleep at this hour. I can focus entirely on my sword without thinking of such distractions.)
(There are the sounds of the breeze and the trees, but they serve to sharpen my mind instea…– Hm?)
— Who goes there!?
Eeek!?
Mashiro…?
I– I’m sorry! Please just spare me my life…!
I will not take your life, but… Why were you hiding behind that tree?
Uuu, well, that’s… The truth is—
To Try A Horse By Ride 3
… So, yeah. When I’d asked them about it, it turned out they were going for the same roles.
Hokuto-senpai is going for the role of the main character, and Tsukinaga-senpai is going for the role of the traitor…
As a fan of his, of course I want Hokuto-senpai to get the lead role of the series…
And Tsukinaga-senpai would definitely nail his role too, with it being someone who acts kindly, but harbors an inner dark side…
The two of them are perfect fits for those roles. To be honest, I don’t feel like I stand a chance.
But… As an actor, I don’t just wanna pass it up.
Nothing's started yet, and the application process isn’t even open.
It could even be likely that the production team might have someone in mind for the role already.
Still, I have to act. If there’s even just a sliver of a chance–
No. There doesn’t even have to be a chance. I’ll make the chance myself
Because auditions are a chance to override the preconceptions people have of you.
… Well, I get that in theory, but I don’t really know how to apply it in real life.
All of the books that would’ve helped as reference were already checked out by Hokuto-senpai and the others.
Even if I tried to learn from historical dramas, they’re really long and old, so I wouldn’t have enough time to get through them all before the audition…
I was like, “Is there a quicker, easier way to learn about samurai?” and observing you, Kanzaki-senpai, was the best thing I came up with.
Quicker and easier, you say?
Yeah. When you think of “samurai”, you definitely think of Kanzaki-senpai ♪
And I was thinking of getting proper permission. I remembered that you’re usually here early in the morning, so I came over.
But, you were really serious, so I couldn’t really find the right moment to say something…
So in the end, I ended up… stalking and watching from behind the tree. I’m sorry it seemed like I was some shady guy.
Hmph. I have a grasp of the circumstances.
I know of that project as well.
Huh. If that’s the case… Are you planning to audition for the role too?
Ahh, damn, of course you are. You’re the ideal candidate for that series.
“Of course I am” … Well, it makes sense that you would think that. Actually, the production team did approach me with that exact idea in mind.
I am not taking part in an “oo-dee-shon”. They approached me with the role directly.
They approached you… So, you were given an offer?
That is right. They offered me the role of the final shogun Tokugawa Yoshinobu.3
The final shogun…! They gave you that important of a role?
And it was an offer too… I’d thought it was weird that there were lines for the role in there, even though auditions for it hadn’t been announced...
Well, it makes sense, it seems like important roles like that always tend to go to Kanzaki-san… Of course you would be hand-picked personally!
Mmm. I was very grateful that they reached out to me, but…
… Huh? Was there some kind of problem?
Not so much a problem, but… I’m a little hesitant to take on the role of Tokugawa Yoshinobu.
And that is because when it comes to the roles I receive for “dorama,” I am always, always casted as the samurai.
In the beginning, that pleased me greatly. I thought quite proudly that there was no one more suitable for it than I.
But lately, it has bothered me. It is very clear that they have a simplistic train of thought about this: “He is the clear choice, because he knows everything about samurai.”
I feel as if they cast me not because they see my actual acting ability, but because they decide by themselves that… well, if there is a “samurai role,” Kanzaki Souma is the perfect fit.
Of course, I take pride in being established where I am recognized in that way. It is the personification of proof of all the efforts and accomplishments I have accumulated.
But at the same time… I feel that I am only ever seen as a “thing that can play a samurai.”
Samurai are broadly generalized with one word, but in reality, they lived in very different ways depending on the time period.
Because of that, I have tried to create different interpretations based on the project, through precise alterations in speech and conduct, but…
It often gets accepted as is without checking if it is correct, nor with any re-dos and discussions.
As that continued, it made me think that no one sees Kanzaki Souma’s range or potential as an actor. It is very disheartening.
So that’s how you feel, Kanzaki-senpai…
I’m really sorry I said “of course” you were fit for the role, earlier…
Hmph… it is alright. Lift your head, Mashiro.
What did I say? I take pride in being established and recognized in that way.
Alright… But still, I never thought a senior of mine would have those kinds of troubles.
For me, I’m “ordinary” no matter what I do. The only roles that come my way tend to be ordinary, average-joe type roles– the kind anyone could do.
I thought I’d go out for this audition, in order to shake myself out of that role…
But after hearing the things you were talking about, I realized I wasn’t thinking it through nearly enough.
Having a distinct character, just being plain ordinary... No matter who you are, everyone has their own set of troubles, huh?
Humans are creatures who are eternally dissatisfied, after all. It is exactly because of that that humans aim to reach even higher heights.
Anyways… Mashiro. If you want to do something like learn about “samurai” quicker and easier, there is one way.
How about it? Would you like to accompany me for training one day soon?
Huh? Training…?
They say you should “try a horse by riding him, and judge a person by spending time with him.”4 You aren’t truly going to understand things by merely watching or hearing about it.
The knowledge you get from books or film does nothing if you cannot put it into practice. That being the case, you’ll learn it even quicker if you begin with practical experience from the very start.
The path of the samurai is not something you “learn” in your head, but something you grasp with your mind, body and spirit.
I see… Well, they do say a picture is worth a thousand words, after all.
Kanzaki-senpai! Please allow me to accompany you for training…!
To Try A Horse By Ride 4
— Ah, you’re here.
Good morning, Kanzaki-senpai! Today’s the day, I’m looking forward to being under your care!
Yes, the pleasure is mine.
By the way, Mashiro, did you get proper sleep last night?
Yep. Why do you ask?
It is not important. You arrived earlier than we agreed, so I thought that the nerves might have made you too restless to sleep.
Ahh… Well, to be honest, I was definitely a little nervous, but not enough to be kept up.
I did some light exercises before I went to bed, so I fell asleep pretty quick.
Thanks to the refreshing morning air, I feel like I could do anything! Or some~thing like that…♪
So, what are we starting with? Is it going to be something like the practice-swinging you were doing yesterday?
Not quite. First, we’ll set out by foot.
Set out by foot… Ah. So we’re going walking as a warm-up exercise, huh?
Yes. Today, we will be spending time in the mountains, after all. Our first objective is to make our way there by foot.
I see, so we’re going to the mountains…
Huh? The mountains!?!? From here!? We’re not gonna take the train–?
How is going by train going to forge your mind and body? Choosing to go on your own two feet is what gives it meaning.
Y–You could say that, but… Huh…?
This is part of your training too. Well then, let us depart, Mashiro.
Yessir. Alright, I’ll do my best…!
To Try A Horse By Ride 5
(... Every step Kanzaki-senpai takes is like a smooth glide. He must be used to making his way up the mountains.)
(Looks like there’s a lot of tree roots I could snag myself on. I really gotta watch my step.)
(Even so, we've been walking for quite a while. I wonder where we’re headed.)
(Hold on, where are we exactly? I didn’t even know there was a mountain like this.)
(... Maybe I should look it up on my phone.)
Uwah!?
What happened? Did a snake come out at you, Mashiro?
N–No, I’m fine. I wasn’t looking where I was going, so I just tripped a little…
Looking at your phone while you’re walking is not an admirable trait.
Yeah… Sorry. I was just curious about where we were going.
It’s… weird. There is a “dot” registering we’re here on the map, but there’s no information at all like what the mountain’s name is.
Hmm… I do not understand how the “in-taa-netto” works very well, but it makes sense that it is not listed.
This mountain is under the Kanzaki family’s jurisdiction, after all. It likely is not known more broadly.
The Kanzaki family’s jurisdiction…! That’s amazing, we’re a part of completely different worlds…
It is not entirely a blessing, you know. If the mountain is left to its own devices, it becomes overgrown, so it requires regular maintenance.
In any case, this mountain has belonged to the Kanzaki clan long before I was born. It is my family’s duty, passed down through generations.
However, we have taken precautions to avoid trespassers, such as not putting up signage.
I see… It’s just some hunting trail to me, but you’d be able to see the path, huh.
Mhm. Deep in the mountains is a training ground my ancestors would use. During the Repayment Festival, I underwent waterfall meditation and fought wild animals.
Huuuh? You fought animals!? That means they were really ferocious ones, right?
I can’t fight like you at all, so anything life-threatening is a bit…
Rest assured. I do not intend to put you through the same training as I.
This time of year, all of the animals are passive. As long as you do not trespass on their territory, they are unlikely to be provoked.
Well, that’s good, but… Animals tend to gravitate towards me, so I’m actually worried they’ll be the ones to approach.
Haha. In the unlikely event that happens, just wrestle them like Kintarō.5
I will be the referee for your match…♪
We’ve arrived at the riverbed. Let us stop here before noon.
Are you tired, Mashiro?
I’m doing okay. We took a lot of good breaks on our way here.
By the way, you said that you would prepare the food, but what are we—
Ah. Is it that we’re going to go hunting…?
Not at all. I did not bring a bow or any traps. Chasing down game would be inefficient anyways.
Besides, there is an abundant river before our very eyes. It is much faster to procure what we need from here.
Look, there is a school of fish swimming.
Yeah, they are… but how are we supposed to catch them? We don’t have any fishing poles.
We will be catching them with our hands, naturally ♪
Huh!? With our hands!?
You are that surprised? Even if you have never secluded yourself in the mountains, you might have had some kind of similar experience, though.
Not at all! The closest I’ve come to touching fish is goldfish scooping at festivals.
Hm… So, this is your first time then. Regardless, we must do what we must to fill our stomachs.
Besides, this is good material for developing your character. I imagine if you were a low-class samurai, they too relied on catching fish at the river for sustenance.
M~n. I don’t remember a scene like that in the script…
But, we've got not tools, so I guess I've got no other choice but to use my hands. Alright, I’ll try it!
Well, go on in then. Put your socks and shoes in your bag!
And watch your step. It is easy to slip on the mossy, slippery rocks.
Eek–! Cold, cold! And the current is way stronger than I thought…!
Calm down, Mashiro. Your yelling is scaring away all the fish.
S–Sorry. … The whole school we just saw really did disappear, huh…
Do not be discouraged. We have only just begun.
Alright? Sharpen your mind and spirit, and stand as if you are becoming one with the river.
One… with the river…?
That is right. From the perspective of the fish, you are an intruder. It is only natural they will be cautious.
But if you stand very still as if you are an extension of the river… They will approach soon after.
I can get the logic behind it, but what should I do to “become one with the river”... Does it just mean I don’t move…?
Alright, I’ll stand still.
(Ah, yeah. Look at that. The fish are slowly coming back.)
(But what am I supposed to do from here…? I wanna ask Kanzaki-senpai, but the fish are going to get scared away if they hear my voice again.)
(Kanzaki-senpai hasn’t moved at all… He said it was for character development, so he might be trying to get me to do it.)
(Alright. Then if it’s like this, it’s now or never—!)
Uuu. Damn it, it got away…!
So close, Mashiro.
It wasn’t close at all. I tried to go for the biggest fish, but I didn’t even touch it.
Hmph. Just because it looked impressive doesn’t mean it’s easy to grasp, you know?
Think about it. A fish that big has managed to survive for a considerable amount of years.
There are many of its predators in the river. It has avoided countless life-or-death situations while slipping through unscathed, so you could consider it a “military veteran” in a sense.
I see… Well, maybe it’ll be easier if I go for a smaller fish when I try again…?
But, a smaller fish means it’s, well, smaller and harder to grab.
That is right. Both are not easy. That is exactly why it is worth the challenge.
Be that as it may, we will be off-schedule if we spend too long on this task. Therefore, I shall lend you a hand.
— Hah!
Whoa… you swung your blade and the fish floated up—
Wait, but there’s no cut. What happened…? Is this what a samurai…?
Mashiro, you don’t have the time to waste. The stunned fish will float away.
You’re right! Lemme get it right away— eep—
I have to watch my step and try not to fall… but if I waste time, I won’t be able to catch up!
He~y! Get back here, fish~!
To Try A Horse By Ride 6
We’ve finally reached the summit.
… Ahh. No matter the time of day or year, the view is just splendid. It is refreshing.
This view makes you realize just how insignificant you are. Doesn’t it, Mashiro?
Y–Yeah… What a wonderful view…
Hm. You seem completely exhausted. Did the waterfall meditation do you in?
Yes… Do you always train like that, Kanzaki-senpai…?
Of course not. This trip is less than half of my usual regimen.
To be honest, I expected you to drop out. You did well to keep up.
I was fighting for my life trying to keep up. If you weren’t here, I’d have lost the will halfway through.
But you didn’t break, right? You have impressed me.
… There is a reason I brought you to the training grounds today, Mashiro.
Yeah. So you could show me the way of the samurai, right?
Correct. But that is not the only reason.
I brought you along so you could forge your mind and soul.
A few days ago, you said you wanted to learn about samurai quickly and easily. That did not go past me unmissed.
Huh…?
As someone who walks the path of the samurai, it has nothing to do with mere skill or etiquette. It is a way of life.
For generations, the Kanzaki clan has supported its lineage through the use of martial arts. It was only natural that from infancy, I was brought up with martial arts.
When I was young, I trained before the sun rose all the way until it set. There were days I worked myself to bitter, bitter tears because I could not swing the wooden sword the way I wanted.
It was the accumulation of all that training that has led to me today, but I am still only halfway there.
You gave me the impression that you felt that “just a little exposure was enough to understand”... And that stuck with me for those reasons.
That is exactly why I wanted you to experience it for yourself. I know that was petty of me, but...
…
… I’m really sorry. I thought that when it came to samurai, you were the absolute image of it… but I never imagined the actual effort behind it.
“Quicker and easier,”... Even I’m just kinda like… “Who the hell do I think I am?” I’m really, really sorry.
No one starts out a master. When I first started out acting, my acting was really unpolished, and I couldn’t catch up with my seniors… It was frustrating, and it was a constant struggle.
At that point, I’d forgotten why I even wanted to do it in the first place.
And today, I had a spectator’s mindset. I figured if I observed you, I’d come to understand samurai one way or another.
Climbing up the mountain, going into the river, sitting under the waterfall… I thought I’d get something just by listening to what you had to say.
… But I’m pathetic. All you did was pull me and help along, and I didn't end up getting anything.
If you don’t take the initiative to do things yourself, you’ll never learn anything.
… Mashiro. That realization is what gives meaning to your coming here today.
To learn the way of the samurai is nothing other than self-reflection. That introspection is the most valuable fruit of all.
What matters is not stopping once you’ve come to terms with it. If you’ve realized something about yourself, the next step is to take action about it.
That determination is what leads to things being done.
… Yessir. Next time I’ll think about it properly and act on my own.
Good. Do not forget that feeling. The path is always the next step you take.
The sun has begun to go down… But at the rate we are moving, we should be leaving the mountains shortly before sunset.
When making your way around mountains, it is easy to injure yourself on the way down. Watch your step, Mashiro.
Sure thing. Apparently going downhill puts a lot of strain on your legs and lower back.
… Ah. There’s the place we did waterfall training a while ago.
...
… I have to think for myself and take action… Alrighty!
— Kanzaki-senpai, please go on ahead! I’ll catch up after!
… Hm? Hey, Mashiro! What are you doing!?
Uwaa— It’s even colder than before.
But… it’s not to where I can’t put up with it. Calm down, me…!
(... The first time we did it, I was just waiting for it to be over. I wasn't really thinking about what stuff like standing under the waterfall was supposed to mean.)
(It's not like I doubted it. I just assumed that if Kanzaki-senpai said something, it had to be true, and so I stopped thinking for myself.)
(But… as an actor, that’s the number one thing I absolutely cannot do.)
("I’ll just do what they tell me to." “I'll just pretend like I get it”... with an attitude like that, I’ll never be able to give a performance that resonates with people!)
(I have to find the meaning in it myself. I have to accept the cold and the pain deep into my heart and body and turn it into fuel!)
(If I don’t do that, the whole journey here will be meaningless…!)
…
(... “Quicker and easier”. I took it as an attitude of trying to learn by cutting corners and being sloppy...)
(But to give it one’s all in as short a time as possible— perhaps that too could be considered “quick”)
(There are techniques that you learn over the course of years, and there are techniques you grasp desperately in the moment on the battlefield, through putting your life on the line.)
(As long as your will is strong, both ways are right…. I don’t think either contradict the way of the samurai.)
… Have you returned, Mashiro? You surprised me, suddenly running off like that.
Here, take this towel.
Thank you so much. Brr…
Was there anything you got from the second waterfall meditation?
… To be honest, I don’t know. While I was under the waterfall, I was just thinking “What is a samurai?”
But while I was thinking that, I didn’t feel the cold and pain of the water. All I heard was the sound of the water, and my head went blank…
And that's when I realized it: how much I actually don't try to think.
My thoughts just stopped the second I tried to confront them instead of running from them... It sunk in real deep that this is my current limit.
I see. “What is a samurai”, then…? That is a hard question.
Huh? You don’t know what it is either, Kanzaki-senpai? Even as a samurai…?
Yes. I am still an inexperienced person myself, after all.
… When I think about it, perhaps I have trapped myself in the mold of "samurai" all this time. No matter what role I was given, I would lump it together with the rest, thinking it was just “another samurai role.”
But watching you today made me remember something. The path of the samurai is not about how one lives their life or how they should be– it is something that resides in the heart itself.
So when we are acting, we should not just act like we think a “samurai acts.” We should instead dig into how a single individual lives their way of life.
And so even if it is the same title of "samurai", we can approach each performance with a new perspective, not just repeat the same one.
It seems I’ve unexpectedly learned something myself. I thank you, Mashiro.
The pleasure’s mine. I was nothing but trouble for you today, so I’m glad to hear you say that… ♪
— Oops, sorry for stopping us from walking! We need to get down the mountain quickly.
… Um, if it’s okay with you, Kanzaki-senpai, could we do a little more training?
It’s still late out today, so we can do it again another time, but… I wanna learn about samurai even more.
It probably won’t be enough in time for the audition, but I feel like I wanna do it for myself at least…
Hey, Mashiro. The way you speak makes it seem like you assume you are going to fail.
I suppose it can’t be helped. I’ll train you early tomorrow morning.
Huh? Really?
Yes. It will be a very good opportunity to re-examine the path of the samurai with you, Mashiro. Let us study hard and work hard, and strive for even higher heights… ♪
Yessir! Next time, I'll throw myself into it for real!
Looking forward to working with you, Kanzaki-senpai!
Translation Notes
- ↑ Jigen-ryu is the art of landing a first blow so severe, a second blow is not necessary.
- ↑ 落ち武者 is more like a deserter or someone who was defeated in battle and has fled a war, in the sense of being a "fallen" warrior.
- ↑ Tokugawa Yoshinobu was the final shogun, before low-ranking samurai and nobles staged a coup and pressured the shogun to resign. What followed was the Meiji Restoration. The beginning of the Contextualizing Shinsei AKATSUKI Note touches on this history.
- ↑ The chapters of this story are based off of this saying.
- ↑ Kintaro (Golden Boy) is a child folk hero known for superhuman strength, bravery, and close connection to nature. As an adult, he became a samurai named Sakata Kintoki; supposedly, this folk hero was based off a samurai in the Heian period with the same name. Ibuki sings a ditty about Kintarō in Idol Story 1.