Mashu Kuon | Idol Story 1
Mn~ The weather’s just right…♪
(Hm? Isn’t that… ES’s producer over there?)
(Looks like a real struggle, carrying all those papers and stuff. She’s working so hard, it makes me feel like I1 want to thank her.)
(But isn’t that a little dangerous? It might be because everything she’s carrying is heavy, but she’s wobbling.)
(And on top of that, the wind is strong. I hope she'll be okay…)
(Eek— right as I said that, a giant gust of wind blew in.)
(As for the Producer… Ahh~ papers went flying, blown out of her hands.)
… Well, it can’t be helped then, huh?
– Hup! Ha! There we go!
Here you are. Next time be careful not to let them get blown away, okay?
Hm? What’s the matter? You’ve got a dumbfounded look on your face.
Oh, were you surprised by me calling out to you out of the blue?
This old man’s name is Kuon Mashu, from MELLOW DEAR US. I’m the unit’s main dancer…
You knew that?
“You’re quite nimble, aren’t you?”
I see. You were surprised by how this old man leapt into the air with a whoosh to grab all your papers.
That’s because I come from a family that’s part of a famous circus troupe, you know~ That was nothing for an old man like me ♪
Even if double the papers you’d lost to wind went flying, I know I could catch them all mid-air. Want me to prove it?
Ahaha, just kidding! It’d be terrible if you lost those documents, right?
I happened to catch a glimpse of what was in them just now when I caught them.
Just so you know, I wasn’t trying to snoop. Won’t you just trust this old man?
You weren’t suspicious of me? Well, that’s a relief ♪ You’re just as kind as I thought.
Hey now, what are your intentions, being sweet to this old man? Not to brag, but this old man falls in love with anyone who’s nice to him, you know.
The truth is, I’ve been interested in you for quite a while now. You seem like a nice kid, Producer-chan— I like you~
How about it? Since we just happened to come across each other, why don’t we go grab some tea?
We won’t be long. If you want, just walking and talking on our way to the cafe is okie-dokie for me~
Of course, it’ll be my treat ♪ You can order whatever you want.
… Huh? Why’d you suddenly move away from me like that? Well, that kinda stings, you knooow–
I got too close? Ahh, so I was being too familiar too fast?
Sorry, sorry! Guess I jumped the gun wanting to get to know you better.
I’m an idol, so maybe I shouldn’t talk about how I come to like people so easily. It looks like it’s already caused a misunderstanding…
I see. You got the vibe I was trying to hit on you?
Hmm… I see… so that’s how I come off, huh~
Is it about personal boundaries? This is how I talk to all the girls in the fan club, but maybe that wasn’t the right move here.
“Fan club?” you ask? Yup, this old man’s “Kuon Mashu Fanclub”…♪
If you become a member of the fan club, all kinds of perks come with it, you know.
For example, once a month, you get to talk to me, take pictures together, stuff like that.
And that’s on top of the work I do for MELLOW DEAR US. It’s a very valuable source of income for this old man ♪ And it’s actually pretty popular, you know?
We accept members all year-round, so if you know any girls who might be interested in this old man, feel free to point them my way, 'kay?
You’re more than welcome too, of course! This old man’s got more than enough fanservice to go around ♪
— Ki~dding. The way I tried to close the distance there definitely put you off, huh. Sorry, sorry!
I’m not actually asking you to join my fan club, so don’t make that dumbfounded face.
It’d be a little awkward for me too if you, the producer, were in the fanclub to begin with ♪
– Seriously though, if you know any girls who might be interested, I’d love an intro! This old man doesn't skimp on his fanservice.
Having a fan club makes a huge difference compared to not having one, y’know.
… “Does it give you a higher fan-count?” Oh, no that’s not what it is. I’m talking about the profits, it’s real lucrative work. Of course, my main source of income, my unit activities, blows those numbers out of the water, but still.
The fans are happy and this old man’s wallet is happy… everyone wins. That’s what the Kuon Mashu Fanclub’s all about ♪
Ah, but keep what I said a secret from Nice-san, ‘kay? If he finds out, it’s gonna be a real headache.
Still, if that happens, I might have to ask you to hook me up with a nice, lucrative job or something. How’s that?
I don’t know much about work in Japan, so it’d be a real comfort having you around, Producer.
Mhm, that’s right. As an old and seasoned veteran, I’ve got no problems getting solo work.
To end on that note, if you come across anything good and profitable, you make sure you let this old man know, ‘kay… ♪
Translation Notes
- ↑ Mashu refers to himself as おじさん (oji-san; older man/uncle). While he uses his own name Mashu as a third-person pronoun onstage, he uses Oji-san as a third-person pronoun offstage. I primarily translate him using "this old man" as his pronoun(?), but I also incorporate "I" and "me" at times for ease of reading. Just know that in this story, he either doesn't use a first-person pronoun or uses Oji-san.